Sweet Anarchy
by gypsydoll
Summary: Sophia's life as she knows it is over, whether she likes it or not she's forced to begin a new chapter after the death of her beloved grandfather. As she starts settling in to Charming and getting to know its residents she wonders whether shes really meant to be there and how her life changed so much so quickly.
1. Gone Too Soon

**CHAPTER 1-Gone Too Soon**

 _ **Disclaimer: I'm only doing this once to cover my butt, I do not own sons of anarchy which includes any of its plots or characters that i may use. All i own are my original characters and ideas. Now that it's out of the way i hope you all enjoy my story. All feedback is appreciated.**_

Who ever at some point in time dared to say that life is boring obviously didn't know what the hell they were talking about. You can be living a completely normal ordinary life and then something comes right up and slaps you in the face.

Less than a week ago I was a decently happy art student living in a crappy apartment the size of a closet in Boston. That was until I got the call that my grandpa, the most important person in my life, had passed away. I'm not sure I've really processed it, like my mind is so in shock that I'm going through the motions but not actually allowing myself to feel anything.

I've been helping out with all the funeral arrangements I can but now as I box up the last of my belongings I get ready for the long cross country drive to Charming California I say goodbye to the place I've called home for a year and put my dreams on hold. I hadn't spent a ton of time in Charming since pappy usually came up to stay with us during the summers but as I got older I did like to visit and would even spend a few weeks out of the summer there helping him with the bakery.

If there's one place my granddaddy loved as much as his family it was Lola's Bakery. Before I was even born my grandpa Earnest and grandma Lola moved to Charming, shortly there after she died in a car accident and he opened the bakery in her honor. It always pained me, never having had the chance to meet her, but such is life.

Now I no longer have my granddad either but I know for a fact that his wish was that I take over the bakery at some point. He always felt that I had a gift for baking just like my grandma Lola did but I'd beg to differ.

Either way it doesn't matter cause the bakery and their home is my inheritance and regardless of my trepidation and the sadness of not just losing someone I love but putting my dreams aside, ill be damned if I let him down. That bakery is part of our family legacy and I'll do whatever I have to in order to keep it running.


	2. Life Is a Highway

**Chapter 2- Life Is a Highway**

Through the speakers of my 1999 Dodge Intrepid blares the sounds of Bon Jovi. I let the music fill my mind as I try to keep it from racing with a good 20 hours still to go on my 40+ hour drive to Charming. There's an almost empty 20oz cup of dark coffee with another already finished and discarded as I try to last as long as possible without stopping.

All I can think about is getting there and taking it from that point on. Not long ago I received a call from my mom telling me she would be arriving tonight, taking a flight with my sister from South Carolina.

My grandparents on my moms side passed away when I was young, I don't really remember them but from what I've heard he was an alcoholic who left my mom when she was little and then popped in sporadically, eventually drinking did him in and my grandma was kind and loving but had a weak heart and ultimately it caused her death.

I know this is hard for her, Grandpa Earnest was like a dad to her even after my dad was killed in action four years ago. Its crazy to think about how much loss my whole family has endured I just pray that we don't have to experience any more. I haven't seen my mom or sister for almost six months being away at school but it pains me that this is what's getting us together. My big sister Laura was named after my mom Lauren and she's been the best friend I've ever had, yes I have extremely close friends that I love but I can trust my sister undoubtedly and right now I want nothing more than to see her and hug her.

My eyes begin to sting as I think about my family and I force myself to go back to that safe place where I felt numb and my mind was blank. After another four hours on the road I can't take it anymore, my mind is groggy, my eyes are burning from lack of sleep and strain as I will them to stay open. I honestly can't recall when I ate last and I gotta pee like nobody's business so I keep a look out for a rest area a mile down the road and get off.

Looking down at my phone I see it's a quarter past 6 a.m. which means I've driven 24 hours straight on coffee, red bull and hot Cheetos which can't be a good combo. I quickly exit my car and run to the bathroom then grab a sandwich from one of the fast food places inside. Somehow the buzz of people traveling, stopping to get food or stretch their legs for a while is soothing. They don't know why I'm traveling and I don't know why they are either but we're all bound together by hunger and exhaustion.

I let myself savor the sandwich and buy another one for the road, taking it out to the car I immediately grab my windshield sun shade putting it up so that I can sleep for a bit without the sun shining in my face. What feels like five minutes later I blearily open my eyes to see its close to 9 a.m. With a loud curse I sit up stretching my sore muscles, swiftly removing the sun shade I set out again stopping to get coffee before hitting the wide open road.


	3. Rude Awakening

The call from my mom comes at around 7 p.m. letting me know they arrived safely and asking how I am. I know they would have preferred that I fly instead of drive but I needed to bring stuff with me and that wasn't possible on a plane. I make sure to stop to eat this time knowing there's another ten hours of driving ahead of me and my stomach nor my legs will make it that far at the rate I'm pushing myself.

Nearing 6 a.m. I'm crossing the big "Welcome to Charming, our name says it all" sign. Every part of my body aches and I feel a overwhelming desperation to arrive, if I never drove again it might still be too soon. My mind at this point is mush and I admittedly am not focusing very well, that's probably why I didn't see the biker right in front of me until I had to violently slam my brakes to keep from ramming right into him.

Needless to say I'm wide awake now as the sound of my tires screeching to a halt fill the dead silent town. My breath is coming out in quick short bursts as I try to get it under control but my heart starts racing faster as I see the guy get off his bike. I quickly throw my car into park ready to apologize profusely, I can tell when someone is ready to curse the hell out of you and I'd rather stop it before it starts.

I jump out of my car and he's no more than three feet away, if I wasn't so frazzled, hungry and sleep deprived I might have taken in how handsome he is in a hard edged kind of way with long blonde hair and a beard that's just long enough to give him a tough bad boy look but not long enough to be off putting. His eyes are a brilliant clear blue full of fire and anger right now, most definitely aimed straight at me.

His physique is muscular but lean complimenting his tall frame and broad shoulders. I may have also realized that I've met him before quite a few times when I'd visit my grandpa. We didn't speak or hang out but did exchange a few hellos. I see his mouth open ready to yell and probably ask what the heck is wrong with me 'with much more colorful language' but I beat him to the punch trying to diffuse the situation before it gets heated.

"I am so so sorry, I know I almost hit you I should've been paying more attention but the roads were clear and I've been driving a few days straight. I know that's not an excuse but I am sorry". He closes his mouth and he looks me over for half a second, well at least my rambling gave him pause. I see a flicker of recognition in his eyes as he starts to speak "you're here for Earnests funeral?" I shake my head yes not wanting to admit it out loud.

He sighs heavily running his hand through his long blonde locks "I'm real sorry about your grandpa he was a good guy, but you need to be careful any one else would've chewed you out before you said a word". I feel my cheeks flush in embarrassment and let my hair fall forward trying to hide it. "I know and I appreciate that. I don't wanna be rude especially after I almost hit you but I honestly just wanna get to the house". I put my hand on my open car door trying to signal that I'm ready for the exchange to be over. I really was sorry for almost running him over but I didn't.

I'm tired and my mood is getting worse by the second as my mind and body rebel against me for depriving it of precious sleep and proper nutrition. It doesn't help that people seem to be getting up and on with their day which means us standing in the middle of the road is gonna start to catch their attention. He looks around and digs his hands into his jacket pockets. "alright come on, I'll follow you there make sure no one gets mauled on your way there". I catch a glimpse of his smirk as he turns and saunters back to his bike.

My anger starts to rise and I open my mouth to yell at him and tell him I didn't need him following me anywhere ever but close it instead realizing that it'll just take more time and ultimately be pointless. If I go along with it we'll be there in probably five minutes and he'll be gone. My estimate is right and in no time I'm pulling into the drive way.

I turn the car off and step out in time to see him drive off, I don't have the energy to so much as roll my eyes so I shut the door and walk up the steps to see my sister swinging the door open and welcoming me with a hug.


	4. Bittersweet Memories

**Chapter 4-Bittersweet Memories**

Despite how happy I was to see my mom and sister I excused my self fairly quickly choosing to go sleep. There's no way I could make it through the events that will take place in the next few days without properly resting. I sleep through a good portion of the day until my mom wakes me up so I can shower. I stumble along to the bathroom after grabbing my clothes, its not until I've spent nearly 15 minutes under the steady stream of warm whatever that I'm fully awake.

I know I should try to hurry but in this moment the small shower feels like a sanctuary, outside is a lifetime of memories contained within the walls of this home. I keep waiting for the breakdown to come where I fall apart and reality fully sinks in. Part of me knows it won't happen now, most likely once the funeral is over and everyone goes home, once I'm all alone with nothing but my thought that's when it'll hit me.

A knock on the door brings me out of my thoughts and I quickly finish showering. Wrapping the towel around me I stand in front of the mirror wiping it with my hand. Its funny how I look the same as always, same hazel eyes, same long brown hair and sun kissed skin but yet I feel so different like all of a sudden a part of me is gone. I rub my face tiredly and brush out any tangles in my hair throwing it into a messy bun and slipping into light denim jeans, a elbow length white button down and ballet flats.

I walk out and into the kitchen to find my mom and sister eating lunch. "Hey sweetie, I'm glad to see you're up" my mom says as she leans over to hug me once I take a seat. "Yeah I'm really sorry I know you guys probably had to keep finalizing plans without me, that drive was just brutal". I grab a sandwich off a platter in the middle of the table and pour myself some sweet tea "It's all good we figured you'd need sleep once you got here plus it meant I got to have moms pancakes all to myself" My sister Laura teases me sticking her tongue out so I throw my napkin at her causing us to giggle and my mom to roll her eyes but its obvious she's trying to fight back a smile.

I bite into my sandwich and look around at the place so infused with my grandfathers spirit and instantly feel bad for laughing. I look at Laura and can tell she's thinking the same thing so I reach out and grab her hand giving it a squeeze. The rest of the day goes by in a blur as we make countless phone calls to distant relatives and old friends of my grandpas. There was also a trip to the funeral home to pick out the casket and a few other details then set up payment for it all.

Close to evening time we went and ordered a bunch of hors d'oeuvres for the people coming to the house to pay their respects following the funeral. At the end of the day I'm grateful to have had my mom and Laura with me, I cant imagine us doing all of this without the support of each other.

Dinner consisted of a couple of burgers we picked up from the local diner and brought home, after an emotional day we each just took ours and went our own way to eat in silence. Afterward I just laid in bed looking at the ceiling replaying old memories in my head like the time pappy stayed with us during the spring instead of summer, I must have been eight and Laura eleven.

For a whole week he waited until we were marked as present in school around 8:45 then he signed us out and took us out. One day we got ice cream and went bowling, another day he took us to swim at the lake. I get lost in the memory until I feel the bed dip and look to see my sister laying down next to me and for a while we're quiet until I break the silence "I was just thinking about the time pappy helped us ditch school for a week so we could hang out with him".

I hear her chuckle lightly with a look of fondness on her delicate features. "That was great just like when you were five and he surprised us with a trip to Disney land. For months you wouldn't stop wearing the mickey ears he bought us". I smile recalling that magical moment "I still have those too, I really should wear them more often". She bumps my shoulder with hers and I smile, she grabs my hand and once again we're surrounded by silence both absorbed in our bitter sweet memories. That's the exact position we fall asleep in taking comfort in each others presence.


	5. It Will Rain

**Authors Note: Thank you so much! this story is up to 410 views. Thank you to everyone whose reviewed or favorited cause it means a lot to me. All feedback is greatly appreciated and welcomed. It starts picking up after this, please enjoy :)**

 **Chapter 5- It Will Rain**

Today is the day, there's no avoiding it anymore. Today is the day it all becomes clear and I say my last goodbye to the last father figure in my life. By nightfall we'll have buried him and I'll be seeing Laura and my mom off as they bored the plane taking them back home. I'll never admitted it but I'm scared, terrified even, of being left alone with my own thoughts. I straighten out my black knee length dress with a bow at the waist and delicate lace around the collar.

I remember splurging on this after the end of last semester as a reward to myself for surviving it. I kept it thinking I might meet a cool guy and we'd go to an art show or something and there would be this beautiful dress but I never did and doubt I'll ever wanna pull it out again after wearing it today. The rest of the day is a blur as I focus on just keeping it together, I vaguely remember resting my single white rose on his casket and then everyone hurrying away back to the house to pay their respects.

I can't say I was surprised to see so many people show up cause I've never met anyone who didn't love pappy. It was interesting to see a group of tough looking men in leather vests walking in and respectfully almost quietly coming to speak to us and offer a few kind words. Despite their good intentions it seemed like a lot of people in the room suddenly tried to step away as much as possible without being obvious, things got quieter and the air almost felt thicker. Just as soon as they arrive they take their leave only leaving behind a woman in her forties I'd say who I'd overheard being called Gemma. With her dark hair, sharp eyes and five inch boots you can just tells not to be messed with.

Somewhere in the muddle that is my brain I recall seeing a familiar head of blonde hair with his usual swagger and start to wonder how well he knew my grandpa. I finally exhale in relief as everyone starts to leave until its just myself, Laura, my mom and Gemma who insisted on staying behind and helping. Cautiously I approach her "You're Gemma right? I'm Sophia". I extend my hand expecting her to shake it but instead she gives me a quick hug "I know sweetheart, you probably don't remember me but I came around the bakery all the time. I really am sorry earnest was a hell of a man". I nod and attempt to smile but I can tell by the look on her face that she can see right through it "alright, why don't you go get ready to take your family to the airport, I'll finish up here" she tilts her head signaling to the room and I open my mouth to protest but she's having none of it, pinning me with a stern look she turns me around and towards the bedrooms.

Frankly I no longer have the energy to fight it or question why she's being so nice or even stayed back to help when she doesn't really know us but those will have to be questions for another day. Almost as if on auto pilot I change and help Laura get her stuff into my car finding that my mom already had. The trip to the airport is mostly silent and as I stand in the airport hugging them goodbye I contemplate holding on forever so they can't leave but I don't knowing they already feel guilty for having to leave.

They blow me a kiss and I return it and they disappear to board the plane. My legs feel like they're weighed down by cement and my heart is gonna rip in two but I walk to my car anyways. On the drive home without realizing it I drive to the cemetery, by now it has to be around 10pm there's no one in sight to stop me from walking over to my grandfathers resting place. I can't quite remember when I sat on the ground nor when the rain started much less how I ended up laying myself onto the still fresh dirt.

I'm not entirely sure how long I laid there in the mud as the heavy rain poured over me washing away the tears that were finally falling. I only become vaguely aware of how cold I am and how violently my body is shaking until someone tries to gently lift me off the ground. My body is going numb and my mind is following, the only thing I register is the sight of leather and silky blonde strands before the world fades to black.


	6. Rise

**AUTHORS NOTE: I'm sorry its so short, I will be uploading again this week I'm just really sick and its getting late but as a thanks for all the new people reading my story I wanted to come through and give you at least what I had written so far. Love 3**

Slowly I let my eyelids flutter open, I have that weird feeling you get when you nap to long knowing you've either slept for five minutes or five days. Immediately I realize I'm not wearing the same thing I was before and that my hair is still wet clinging to my face. It's then that the memories come back to me of laying on the ground freezing. I sit up entirely too fast and have to let my body adjust and the spots to leave my vision. Standing up I tuck the wet strands behind my ears and grab some pj pants noticing I have nothing on but an oversized t-shirt.

I look at my nightstand to see a note hastily written 'Be careful, call me if you need anything-JT' with a phone number scribbled under. I put the note down not sure what to do with it and walk out into the kitchen to see Gemma sitting there drinking coffee. As soon as she sees me she scoots a mug over to where the seat next to her is and I gratefully accept.

I drink it down ignoring how the still too hot beverage is burning my tongue but stop when I feel eyes on me. Putting the mug down I awkwardly clear my throat "You didn't have to stay or make the coffee, I appreciate it but I'm just fine". She raises a single arched brow "That would be more convincing if I didn't have to send my boys all around town trying to find you. Jax finally spotted you around 3am on the ground soaking wet and freezing".

Automatically my face goes candy apple red in embarrassment, I suppose saying I'm 'fine' was maybe an exaggeration when she says it like that. A look of knowing crosses her eyes again and she leans forward placing her hand on my arm "I know its hard to loose people sweetheart, but you need to get it together. I'm gonna go now but you know how to find me if you need anything. Charming's a small town and things work better when we all stick together". Just like that she's out the door and I can't help but feel like there was more to that last statement than meets the eye.

Either way I don't care at the moment, my body aches in all kinds of places and my stomach is begging to be fed. A glimpse at the clock shows that its half past 2 in the afternoon and I groan at having wasted all day. I walk back to the room wanting to get ready for the day so I can go out and get some food. I pause momentarily seeing that the door to my grandpas room is open and I go and close it now even peeking inside, I'm not ready to I just can't let my emotions take ahold of me again the way they did last night.


	7. Give 'Em To Me

This story just reached 1,000 reads! Which is crazy so in celebration I want you guys to give me any and all suggestions of something you'd like to see in the story. It can be anything and I'll pick a winner! Just review or message me 3 3 Be creative and have fun! I'll try to have another long chapter up soon. Love you guys :)


	8. Sing Out

Authors note: I'm sorry for the slow and short updates I've been having a lot of health and family issues making it hard to spend as much time on this story as I'd like but things seem to be getting somewhat better so I hope to have more time. Thank you for taking the time to read it and I hope you stick with me. I didn't have a ton of time to write this chapter so hopefully its still alright.

Guest- I had two guest reviews and I just wanted to say that there will definitely be more Jax interaction soon I promise and I did find Gemma taking over funny. I didn't even know I was gonna write that in then it just came to me and it felt like something she would do haha.

Foreverkee- You're totally on to something, I do want the bakery and her grandfathers relationship with the sons to play a role and I'm for sure working on longer chapters…fingers crossed.

Ashes2Dust18- I'm trying to write longer chapters at the moment so I hope you stick around and hopefully keep enjoying the story :D

Back in my room once again I dig around for something more than just a t-shirt to wear, lord knows I've embarrassed myself enough there's no need to add to it by walking out like this. I end up grabbing a mid thigh summer dress with a denim jacket and brown leather lace up boots. Throwing my hair in a ponytail I apply a little makeup to help take away that half dead sleep deprived look I'm currently rocking. Grabbing my army green messenger bag that's seen better days and making sure I've got my keys I finally walk out and make my way to the nearest diner.

Driving around I roll down my window and take a deep breath remembering how much I used to love coming here. Something about the small town feel with all the local businesses and not a Starbucks or burger king in site just made me feel like I had been transported to a different time. Walking into the diner I sit myself at a booth near the back and peruse the menu options. "Hello dear, nice to see a new face around here" Startled by the unexpected voice I quickly look up to see a kind older lady standing there in a red and white waitress uniform, short blonde hair tied back and a name tag reading 'Josie'.

The moment I look up she recognizes me and her face lights up, I stand up to reciprocate the hug I could see coming "Hey miss Josie, its so nice to see you again" I give her my best smile slowly sitting back down and she puts a hand on my shoulder "Its been so long hun but you look beautiful. I know these aren't good circumstances but I hope you'll be sticking around some". I had met Josie years ago when my granddaddy first moved here, she had to be one of the sweetest people I'd ever met and I've had more than a few midnight slices of pie with her when I couldn't sleep and would make my way over here. I'd never say it but I always secretly hoped she and pappy would hit it off, a second love for both of them but it never happened and now I can't help but be grateful it saved her the heartache of having to see a second husband pass away if it had worked out.

"Yeah miss Josie, I'll definitely be sticking around some. I need to get the bakery going again". I feel her rub my shoulder and a sad smile cross her lips "You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that. You'll be good for this town. Plus now that I know I can make sure we got apple pies ready just in case you make a habit of popping in at all hours of the night again". She gives me a playful wink and smile and I cant help but laugh softly. Despite how this day started, coming here was the best decision I made.

I needed a warm familiar face to remind me why I was here and that everything would be ok. After a couple more minutes of chatting I order a burger and fries to go wanting to check out the bakery as soon as possible and assess what needs done to get it running again. I sit there looking through my phone while I wait for my food to be done, In the distance I hear the door bell chime signaling the entrance of a costumer. I don't pay it much attention and continue to scroll through my many unread messages until someone sits opposite me in the booth. Sitting there is an older looking heavy set man with an oxygen tank in a elbow length black shirt and denim vest with a patch on one side reading 'First 9' and two on the other side with 'Redwood' and 'Original' on each one. Despite his age he doesn't seem like someone I'd like to catch on a bad day.

I search my brain and roughly remember seeing him in the bakery and speaking to my grandfather. I'm not sure what to do so I take the safe route and wait for him to speak, I can tell his trying to read something almost examining my face and it doesn't help my level of unease. "I hear you're taking over Lola's" he says in a gruff voice telling of a hard life full of plenty smoking and drinking. I nod slowly and he looks away thoughtfully "Earnest and I were friends and he was a friend to the club. If you're gonna do it, do it right. Once you get it open you'll see us there pretty regularly. If anyone gives you trouble you find me, I may look old and half dead but I have no problem shoving my boot up someone's.."

"aand here is your food sweetheart". I struggle to hold back a laugh at Josie's interruption and subsequent look thrown his way "As for you Piney, that's not the kind of language you use around a lady" she turns on her heels and marches off while Piney throws a half sarcastic apology her way then turns to me and rolls his eyes. I finally let a snicker slip out and the side of his mouth tilts up into a smile. Reaching into his pocket he pulls out a piece of paper with his name and number, setting it on the table he taps it and gets up silently telling me to save it. I watch him walk out and drive off on his bike, the only thing I can do is shake my head and scoop up my food and the piece of paper at last making my way to the bakery.

Unlocking the doors and walking in was such a surreal experience, the memories this place holds are in stark contrast to the now empty lonely looking place. When I turn the lights on I can see dust is already starting to settle on every surface and the display case has stale cookies, cakes and pastries of all kind showing what a sudden and unexpected event pappy's death was. I dig around for a bit until I find a clean rag and head to the back into the baking room and clean off one of the stainless steel work tables bringing a stool over to eat my lunch.

While I eat I look around mentally survey things, the first task will have to be cleaning and throwing out anything that has gone bad. Setting up a plan of action in my head helps to keep me focused and grounded but after a while the silence becomes too much and I turn on the old radio in the corner. Inside is an old cassette mix tape of some of my grandfathers favorite songs. The first one up is a Beach Boys song and my mood lifts instantly, putting aside my left overs I roll my jacket sleeves up and start on the task at hand. Without even realizing it about 15 minutes and a few good songs in I start to sing and dance around while I got the place looking clean and vibrant once again.

A few hours into my clean I'm kneeling on the floor scrubbing the inside of one of the ovens belting out Cat Stevens 'If you want to sing out, sing out' In the loudest most off key way possible when I hear clapping behind me and automatically go to lift my head unfortunately I just end up banging the back of it against the top of the oven. Rubbing my aching head I take the smarter route backing out before turning and looking up. I can feel the vein on my temple pulse as I look at a smirking Jax Teller watching my kneeling form while I cradle my head. In a huff I stand walking to the nearest mirror to make sure my head is fine then turning to my unwelcome guest with crossed arms.

"You alright there darlin'?" If anyone has ever wondered whether you can be annoyed at someone and check them out at the same time the answer is yes and that adds to my annoyance. "I'm not as fine as I was about 5 minutes ago when someone decided to walk in uninvited" its then that I realize that the radio is still on and I'm having to yell over it. Honestly could I be an even bigger dork? For some reason every encounter we've had results in me looking like an idiot. I shut it off and turn back catching him looking me over.

"I wouldn't have been able to if the door wasn't unlocked. Even in a small town its not smart for a woman to be alone at night with the doors unlocked". I raise my eyebrow at him and roll my eyes "its gotta be like what, 4pm maybe? I'd hardly call that night time". The moment that smirk comes into view I know I've said something stupid, my eyes follow him as he approaches until his in front of me, I go to protest when he places his hands on my hips until he swiftly turns me around and lifts one of his hands to point at the clock on the wall clearly indicating that its nearly a quarter after 9pm and I feel a heat rise up to my cheeks only accentuated when Jax leans down his chin nearly resting on my shoulder "Looks like its just a tad after 4 doesn't it".

I can hear the laugh in his voice although he doesn't let it out and if I didn't think I could blush any more I was wrong. I look down so the hair that's come loose from my ponytail can cover my face. Pulling his hands off of me I walk off grabbing the dirty cleaning towels and putting them in a pile just to make myself busy. "Well I guess its later than I thought but as you can see I'm perfectly okay so you can feel free to show yourself out". I spare him a glance then look down at my hands tying up the various full bags of discarded sweets and trash. I hope he took the cue and is leaving but know better cause I would've heard him walk out.

I go to grab two of the bags but he grabs them away from me, before I can start protesting he's out the door then back for the rest "Its how I was raised darlin' and you weren't gonna win that fight so I saved us both the time". Again I go to yell at him but he's out taking the trash before I get a chance and I have the sudden urge to throw something at him, who does he think he is. When he walks back in I've already grabbed my keys and bag and shut off the back lights, he walks through with an indiscernible look in his eyes and I reach to turn the front lights on so I can walk out and close up the bakery but he comes up and does it for me despite my finger already being on the switch.

We walk out and I lock up turning, in the opposite direction of my car, just so I can avoid him until he gets on his bike that's conveniently parked next to my car and drives off. The plan is squashed though when one of his strong hands grabs me softly "come on" with a tilt of his head towards his bike he starts walking expecting me to follow. I stand there indignantly and he looks up with questioning eyes grabbing the helmet off his bike handles. "Who do you think you are? I barely know you so why in Sam hell would I just follow you somewhere? I'm not sure what kind of girl you're used to being around but it takes more than a pretty face to get me to go anywhere with you".

Some time during my rant he leaned against his bike with his arms crossed and a look close to amusement. I stand there waiting for him to say something until I realize he's not going to, I watch him get on his bike and put his helmet on so I just walk around him to get to my car. I've almost made it when I feel him grab my hand and gently pull me back. "Come on Sophie, lets grab something to eat consider it an apology".

I'm tempted to say yes, I'm not extremely close to anyone in town, I certainly don't have friends here and it sounds much more appealing than eating dinner alone but then I see that over confident look in his eye and know he expects me to say yes cause I very much doubt any girl has ever said no to him so that's exactly what I do.

Leaning in close as if I was going in for a kiss I turn my head at the last second whispering in his ear "Not interested" Then pull away and saunter over to my car but not before catching the surprised look on his face. Driving off I look in the rear mirror and know that I'll be seeing much more of Jax Teller. Only time will tell whether that's a good or bad thing.


	9. Long Promised Road

_**Authors Note: 2 chapters in one day! Woooo! Please enjoy and review so I know if you guys like where this is heading. All feedback is welcome because I want to make this story as good as I possibly can for you all. Constructive feedback is obviously the preferred kind haha hope you guys are having an awesome day :D**_

 **Chapter 8- Long promised road**

Ultimately I do end up back at home on my own sitting at the dining table eating left overs and wondering what the heck I'm doing here. Now that most of the clean up work at the bakery is done I have to actually start going through the recipes and making everything to stock the display case before being able to open again. Not to mention going over the books and figuring out the finances. To think not long ago I was just an art student surviving off energy drinks and 90's music. Putting away the rest of the left overs I walk over to the big oak bookcase in the living room where my granddad kept one of his hand written recipe journals.

Determined to make this work I flip through trying to find a recipe that seems simple enough. I come across his recipe for caramel shortbread squares and it seems straightforward enough. I make sure to gather all the ingredients first and change into some sweatpants and a comfy tank top, securing my hair into my bun I start on my mission determined to succeed. If only will was all you needed to master a skill because despite my optimism and genuine intent to make the best god darn caramel shortbread squares anyone has ever come across, the results weren't all that pretty. Close to an hour after my mission began I have a sauce pan with stuck on burnt caramel, or at least what was supposed to be caramel.

I managed to make it work by casting it into the sink and starting on the caramel but unfortunately while melting the chocolate chips for the top chocolate layer I must have overheated it or something because it was way too thick and nearly impossible to spread over the caramel layer. So in the end I had a pan of somewhat okay tasting caramel shortbread crumbles with too thick chocolate and shortbread that crumbles whenever I try to cut out a piece. For a while I contemplate putting it in a cup with some ice cream and selling it as some kind of parfait and then admit defeat and leave the mess riddled kitchen preferring to grab a jacket and head over to the diner for some midnight pie. Driving there is peaceful, there's not a single person out and the night is clear.

Walking in I don't even have to order, just like old times they know if I'm here after 10pm it means pie time. I eat it slowly savoring every bite when Josie comes to sit by me. "I see you've been doing some baking" I can tell my face shows surprise, how does she always know everything? My question is quickly answered when she points to my face and I grab the metal napkin holder up to look at myself and see I have flower scattered over my forehead, cheeks and chin. I let out a laugh grateful once again that no ones around to see me in this state. "Yeah I was trying to practice a couple recipes but needless to say it didn't go too well". "Hun things take time but you're a smart girl and I know you won't give up. Its not in you to do so".

For a minute she stays quiet and I see the moment an idea comes into her head cause her eyes light up. "All you need is someone to instruct you a bit. Not many people know this but your grandpa was close to the sons of anarchy motorcycle club, one of their members Bobby Munson happens to be a fantastic baker. They'd share recipes all the time. You should go down to Teller-Morrow sometime and ask around for him". I thank Josie and pay leaving her a nice tip and think about her suggestion all the way home. Every day I'm here I discover more and apparently my grandpas connection to the MC is a lot more involved than I'd ever known or even noticed.

The truth is I have nothing to lose by going to ask, I need to keep my families legacy alive no matter what and I cant do that if I ruin everything I bake. Arriving home I hear the loud roar of a motorcycle coming down the street and look over to see it park in the driveway across from me. Off gets a tall man with a flannel shirt and beard, leather vest in site with the reaper sewn on to the back and I recognize him as Opie. I most likely have a clear recollection of him cause he came in quite a few times with his kids to buy them a treat when I last visited.

I turn before he catches me looking, honestly its like no matter where I go there's always a son around, they're everywhere and I have no idea how to feel about it. Thankfully its late enough that my mind can no longer focus on anything so I take the fastest shower of my existence and slip into my warm Minnie fleece pajamas and drift off into a dreamless sleep.

The next morning I wake up to a text from Laura wanting to know how I am and scolding me for not keeping in touch. I make a mental note to call her later on knowing the kitchen disaster awaits. It takes a lot of sweat, water and dish soap but an hour later its all under control and I go get ready for the day. I put on a pair of highwaisted pink shorts with a black and white Jack Daniels tank top and ballet flats. I take an oversized cardigan in the car in case it gets chilly later on. With the start of fall here it can get a little chilly in the evenings.

Of course nowhere near Boston temperatures especially as winter comes in a few months. I've got to say I'm looking forward to a west coast winter. Trying to calm my anxiety on the drive to the auto repair shop I think about decorating for the holidays and wonder how Halloween is here. Unfortunately Charming is a very small town and it takes almost no time to reach my destination, mentally preparing myself for whoever I see I take a deep breath and step out of my car. I pass an intimidating looking guy with more tattoos than I could ever count and a shaved head, I give him a welcoming smile as I walk by but it falters when he just stares back then turns his head to keep working on a bike. Okay so maybe he's not the friendly kind but I'm sure Bobby cant be bad if he was close to my grandfather.

My steps almost falter when I spot the familiar silhouette of Jax Teller, I redirect my gaze before he feels me looking. I'm not sure why I was so surprised to see him, of course he'd work here it's a no brainer but lately my brain isn't my best friend. Making my way to a group of about 3 or 4 men in the garage space next to where Jax is I smile as sweetly as I can once they notice my approach. "Hello there I'm really sorry to interrupt" I look around and realize they all have an air of danger to them and wonder again what my grandfathers affiliation with them could possibly be.

A black haired man in what appears to be his forties with startling blue eyes is the one to speak up "It's no interruption sweetheart, what can we do for you?" Somehow the innocent statement sounds almost flirtatious coming from him but I put that aside getting down to the reason I'm here. "Well I was looking for Bobby Munson" This time its an older man with short white hair complete with matching mustache and beard, cigar in hand, is the one to speak up "What for? If I may ask". It was phrased like a question but answering it didn't really feel optional.

"Nothing big honestly, My name is Sophia and I'm taking over my grandpas bakery. I just heard that he and Bobby shared recipes so I was hoping to catch him around. The white haired man with the white hair and patch reading 'President' nods in understanding. "Right you seemed familiar, Earnest was a friend we're all sorry for his passing. Bobby should be in the club house you can make yourself comfortable I'll have someone go get him for you".

I hear him call for a prospect and thank him walking towards a picnic table a little ways off. I look around just observing taking things in, wondering what these peoples lives are like and what they do. I've heard rumors here and there but it was never any of my business, now that my life seems to be intertwining with the members of this club I can't help but question whether I knew my grandfather as well as I once thought.


	10. A New Level

_**Authors Note: I think this is a good time to mention that I'm not sticking 100% to any particular plot line from the show. I'm picking and choosing things based on where I want the story to go. If you have any questions please feel free to ask me and I'll clarify anything you need. Thank you for all the reviews and keep them coming they really are incredibly motivating.**_

 **Khyharah and Foreverkee-** I loved writing that part and having her turn him down cause I don't think any real woman would. I certainly wouldn't be able to haha

 **Khyharah-** I knew right away when I started this that Bobby and his muffin skills would need to come in at some point, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

 **Chapter 9- A New Level**

"This is hopeless, I don't have a bakers bone in my body". I look down at the muffins that never rose with a smiling Bobby close by. "You need to relax kid you're stressing too much". "That's easy for you to say because you don't kill muffins with a single touch". Bobby lets out a loud hearty laugh while shaking his head "You were so busy stressing all the small stuff that you forgot an ingredient, That's why they're flat. Just keep at it but learn to take it easy, I have to go but I'm around if you ever need help ok" With a quick hug he walks out of the bakery and I look to the side and see the measuring cup with the missing ingredient sitting right there.

Bobby's right and I know it, I'm so stressed about this and how much I don't want to fail my grandparents memory that I'm messing up such simple things. Washing everything up and discarding the ill fated muffins I start over again. Putting a little music on I walk to the front and make sure the door is locked this time. I let myself relax and free my mind of any worries just like when I paint. Instead of staring at the recipe every 2 seconds like my life depends on it, I trust that I remember it well and just go off instinct. It's nothing fancy or overly complicated just banana nut muffins but to me they represent the beginning of embracing this new path in life and living up to what I need to do instead of letting it suffocate me.

While I wait for the muffins to finish baking I go to the front having heard a knock at the door, through the glass I see a sharp dressed older man in a suit with salt and pepper hair. He spots me and smiles offering a friendly wave so I walk over to open the door. I'm sure I've never seen him around before but I haven't been here long. Opening the door I greet him and in attempt to be friendly I ask if he'd like to come in. "I'd love to I know it's rude of me to just drop by but I'm opening a cigar shop just across the road and heard this bakery was getting back up and running soon". Being alone in the shop with a stranger makes me feel so uneasy that I casually walk over lifting the blinds off the main store front area, not only to let more light in but the fact that people walking or driving by can see us just helps put me more at ease.

"You heard right, I'm just taking over from my grandfather and it's taking me a bit to just get all our ducks in a row so we can open up again". "Yes of course and forgive me my name is Ethan Zobelle I must've forgotten my manners". I smile offering him a seat at one of the tables and taking the opposite one myself "not at all, I'm Sophia by the way. Is there something I can do for you?". He crosses his legs clasping his hands together over the table and leans in "Actually there is, I understand that you're not up and running yet but everyone I've asked says this is the best bakery in town. I'm helping set up a soup kitchen in town wanting to get involved in the community and was hoping to commission some desserts or pastries to have at the opening".

Just then the kitchen timer goes off and I have to excuse myself, as I take the muffins out I ponder over his request. I'd love to help especially with it being for charity but failing by myself in my kitchen and failing on a big order for people in need are vastly different things. The two sides of my brain argue back and forth but in the end the sight of the perfectly made muffins now sitting before me makes my mind up. I know I can do this and I'll make everyone proud I'll keep up the bakeries reputation and the memory of my grandparents. Taking one of the muffins I set it on a small plate and bring it out with me offering it to Mr. Zobelle before sitting back down.

"I've thought about it and frankly I'd love to, I'm never one to turn down the chance to help the community". I try to be discreet as I nervously watch him take a bite, those nerves are calmed though when he closes his eyes and makes a sound of satisfaction "I'm so glad to hear it and if everything is as good as this muffin I may need a few extra to take home". Over all it was a pleasant interaction and we worked out the details and what day they would need to be delivered and where, We exchanged numbers before saying our goodbyes. Less than a minute after Ethan Zobelle walks out I go to lock the door when a hand stops me by opening up and walking in, of course its Jax he seems to love just coming in whenever he pleases.

"What do you want Jackson?" He grabs me dragging me towards the back, I try to yank my hand away but its no use. When he finally lets go I turn to yell at him "what the hell do you think you're doing? You have no right to barge in like that. "What did he want?" I just stare blankly at him "who?" For the first time since he invited himself in I take the time to look at his face and I've never seen him look so serious. "You know who, Zobelle he just walked out of here so what did he want?". I shrug my shoulders not understanding this mood he seems to be in "He wanted to make an order for some charity thing he's setting up. Why?"

Taking a few step forwards he drops his voice to just above a whisper looking straight into my eyes "Look Zobelle is not a nice guy despite how he may look. Fill the order but that's it, you shouldn't be anywhere near him do you understand?". I want to keep asking questions but one look at his face makes it clear that he is not playing and this is extremely serious. I may have a lot of conflicting feelings about Jax but, annoying habits aside, ever since I came back he's helped me even when he hasn't needed to. Which is why I nod in agreement choosing to trust Jax in this moment. Seemingly satisfied he closes the gap and kisses my cheek "I gotta go but if he comes around call me". Just like that he's gone and I'm left confused, the day certainly took a turn I didn't expect and I think it's time I head home. Boxing up the rest of the muffins I make a mental note to take some to bobby in the morning and hop in my car.


	11. I Shot The Sheriff

_**Authors Note: I know it's a short one but I needed to put it out there. I wanna thank everyone for reading and anyone whos reviewed but I also wanted to dedicate this chapter to**_ **Khyharah** _ **because reading her review got me excited to write some more and that's why you're getting this small bonus chapter today.**_

 **Khyharah- I went back and forth on including Abel but ultimately decided I wanted to include him. I'm messing with the timeline a bit so in this present time Jax and Wendy are divorcing and she hasn't overdosed yet which is what caused Abel to be born early. I want to include that soon in the right moment. I hope I explained that correctly haha.**

 **Chapter 10**

I decide to take the long way home wanting to clear my head, the sun was already setting when I set off but it didn't matter. Actually I preferred it cause it meant I could roll my window down and enjoy the feel of the wind on this clear night with almost no one on the road. Unfortunately for me in my moment of complete relaxation I must've lost track of the speed cause next thing I know there's red and blue lights flashing in my rearview mirror and I'm slowing down to pull over.

I see the officer get out of his car and make his way towards me and I hold in a sigh of annoyance. Of course this had to happen, I can't just enjoy something without some kind of outside interference ruining it. I try my best not to reflect the annoyance I feel in my face when he finally gets to my window and bends down to speak to me. He honestly wasn't what I was expecting, instead of a middle aged man with a pot belly it's a young guy in his early thirties with a fit physique, light green eyes and short dark brown hair. "Hello miss I'm Deputy Chief David Hale, are you aware of how fast you were going?".

For some reason I get the urge to laugh but resist the best I can, it just sounded so scripted and by the book. When I answer that I was not aware, obviously, he must have seen a glint of amusement in my eyes "Do you find something funny about this situation?". Shaking my head no I decide I'm probably better off explaining then maybe he'll just give me my ticket and let me go on my way. "No not at all, I guess I just didn't expect your very matter of fact approach, it felt like I was in a cop show. I didn't mean any harm I'm just on my way home after a long day, I definitely didn't mean to endanger the lives of all the nonexistent people driving down this empty road".

Well shit that sarcasm wasn't really part of my plan to diffuse the situation, I try to smile apologetically while doing an awkward 'please don't arrest me' shrug that must have been at least a tiny bit endearing cause a crack in his cold demeanor appears and a small smile peaks through although he turns away in an attempt to hide it. "Can you please hand me your license?". Wordlessly I grab for my purse and take it out handing it over trying not to push my luck. "Sophia Connolly" he says it almost as if to himself and he slaps my license against his hand a few times looking thoughtful before leaning against my window sill and handing it back.

"I know it's been a tough time and you don't seem like you meant any harm, sarcasm aside, so how about we make a deal?" I look at him skeptically with a raised eyebrow "what kind of deal?" I ask with weariness in my voice. "Well I know a Lola's bakery box when I see one and there seems to be one right there, So, how about I get one of whatever is in there and in return I'll let you off with a warning?". The playful look in his eyes is a drastic but welcome change from the hard ass before and I cant help the smirk and accompanying eye roll before shaking his hand sealing the deal and reaching over gently removing one of the muffins from its safe little spot and handing it over. "This is gonna make my night, now off you go just keep to the speed limit this time".

He goes to walk away but hesitates turning back towards me "I know you haven't been in town very long, maybe I can show you some of the good places to eat sometime". For a second I'm completely thrown off, that was not what I was expecting at all. My automatic instinct is to say no and make up some kind of excuse but seeing the hopeful look on his face, cradling the muffin as if it were a prize I'm tempted to say yes. If anything I'll at least be making a friend and that's something that I don't currently have. It would be great to have some kind of plans to look forward to, maybe a night that didn't involve me eating dinner on my own on the couch while watching trash TV.

"You know what? That'd be nice" and those simple words cause his entire face to light up with a smile from ear to ear and I'm not gonna lie, it felt good for someone to be that excited to get to know me. I quickly give him my number and set off finally getting home. In bed that night thinking about the events of the day I stop and wonder if accepting David's invitation was a good thing, its impossible for me not to think about Jax. I feel something there although its too early to tell if anything would even come of it, plus its not like we're going out or anything our interactions consist of him walking into my bakery whenever he wants and telling me what to do. There is absolutely nothing wrong with me going out with Hale, but then why do I feel so guilty?


	12. I Hate That I Want You

_**Authors Note: I'm sorry it's a short one I just hadn't been able to upload in a few days and wanted to get something out there for you. Thank you for all the support, its so encouraging when I see people reading, favoriting, following and especially leaving reviews. Please enjoy…**_

 _ **Chapter 11- I Hate That I Want You**_

Early the next morning I grab a granola bar real quick and jump in my car with the box of muffins, to say I was surprised that they'd be working so early on a Saturday morning would be an understatement. After all the club Friday night parties weren't exactly secret, people whisper and judge from afar none of them brave enough to say it to any club member directly. When I arrive at the lot it looks empty, I wait a few minutes until Tig and a couple others stagger out not looking incredibly pleased about being up so early.

Spotting Bobby I step out of my car but midway there a figure catches my attention, sneaking a glace to the side I see Jax pulling down his shirt obviously just having thrown it on seconds before with a leggy redhead wearing a skirt so short it might as well not be there and a crop top with tears showing off a red lace bra and a pair of leopard print heels to just round out the parade of classy going on. Before I glance away I see her practically jump on Jax, for the moment I file that away not wanting to give anything away while I approach the guys.

Greeting them all I hand over the muffins and offer hugs to all then make a lame excuse as to why I had to go so quickly. On my way out I see that Jax is now leaning against my car smoking a cigarette and I resist the urge to walk over and yell at him. He really is nothing to me so why should it bother me that he was hooking up with some slut, it really is none of my business. I have a date with David whos obviously a nice upstanding guy so who cares what Jax Teller does, except then why is he coming around my bakery? Why the protectiveness and the kiss on the cheek? I know I'm not completely crazy, he's been trying to get into my life since the day I came back to town but why if he's obviously got enough women wanting to warm his bed.

Ugh the bastard probably just likes the chase then the second I give in I'd just be another one of those stupid girls thinking they could get more than just a one night fuck from the likes of him. By the time I reach my car I've got myself all worked up and the last thing I wanna do is talk to Jax. "Could you move? You're leaning on my door and I need to go". Its obvious that my tone took him off guard and he leans back a little more looking straight at my face "what's got you all worked up doll"

"Don't call me doll and I'm perfectly fine you're just in the way". His eyes clearly show that he doesn't believe me "Did something happen, did Zobelle come around again?" The concern seems sincere and damn him I feel myself soften just a bit but then the image of that girl mauling his lips pop up and I remember that all he's doing is playing with me. I just shake my head and step around opening my door forcing him to get off of it, I make a move to slide in but his hand on the door stops me "what's going on?". The intensity of his eyes is almost overwhelming and I nearly lose myself to them but just in time Gemma makes her presence known and I never thought I'd be so relieved to see her.

"Hi Miss Gemma, how are you?" she looks back and forth at the closeness between Jax and I, I do my best to stop the blush that wants to take over my cheeks "I'm good sweetheart, looks like you're doing better. What brings you to the lot so early?". I take a small step back wanting a little more space between Jax and I "Just came to drop off some muffins but I was just leaving". Its pretty clear that the gears are turning in her head, I've never doubted that Gemma is a smart woman she wouldn't be so intimidating if she wasn't. "I'm glad you're settling in, actually we're having Sunday dinner this weekend. You should come".

I go to protest but I don't really have a good excuse as to why I cant go "No arguments ill text you the details, you can bring the dessert". Striding over she kisses my cheek and then walks away but not before telling Jax to go see her when he gets a chance. "Ma's a little intense but you don't have to go". I close my eyes and let out a sigh "Bye Jax". Finally I slide into my car and close the door getting out of there as soon as possible. It's not fair a single person should not be capable of bringing out so many emotions in you, one moment I want to kiss him and the next I want to punch him.

I know some part of me is attracted to him but this morning made it clear that if he is interested its for nothing more than a fling and before I know it he'll be on to the next one and I cant do that. I refuse to be just another girl who was silly and ended up disappointed and heartbroken. A guy like David hale is who I need, just then a text from hale comes in and I take it as a sign to go for it.

I wasn't made to be with a biker and deep down I know its for the best. I try my best to block all thoughts of Jax while I finalize dinner date plans with David for that night and make an emergency trip a little ways out of town for a dress I can wear. A few hours later I have a small amount of makeup on consisting of a nude eye look with liner and mascara to emphasize my long lashes and a bold red lip to spice the look up. I slip on the white lace mid thigh dress I bought with black detailing around the collar and a black jacket on top. Finishing the look are black stilettos I've had forever and can trust given my occasional moments of clumsiness. I grab my black clutch with my phone and keys setting out to meet hale at the restaurant.


	13. Wondering

_**AUTHORS NOTE: I'm so sorry I know I haven't uploaded in a while its just been a crazy time. I'm trying to write some chapters ahead of time in case I get busy so there won't be such a big lapse in between. Thank you to everyone who has followed and favorited. Special thanks to 22cjwolf22, Riddicks-gurl1988, Foreverkee, Khyharah, nelle76, SweetBlackAngel16 all of your reviews helped me keep writing. I plan to upload another chapter tomorrow where I will reply to your individual reviews and some of the questions that were asked. PLEASE ENJOY!**_

 **Chapter 12: Wondering**

First dates are a weird thing, they can be nerve wracking and exciting signaling the start of something that could be special or they can be one of the most embarrassing and awkward things you ever go through. Either way the lead up is the same because you don't quite know how it'll go which is the primary cause of butterflies and or giddiness. That's what makes this so confusing, I'm on my way to the restaurant it'll be no more than five minutes before I arrive and yet there are no nerves. The previously mentioned butterflies are nowhere to be seen, or felt more like it, and I don't know why. There's anticipation sure, I'm definitely looking forward to it after all David seems nice and is undoubtedly a handsome man but I feel as calm as ever not even stopping to make sure my makeup still looks good before exiting my car and entering the charming little Italian restaurant.

The hostess asks if I have a reservation but before I can even reply Hale is there to greet me and usher me over to our table. He pulls my seat out for me and I have to admit that was quite charming, he sits across from me in a pair of black slacks and a teal dress shirt with a striped tie, his hair nice and neat. There's a couple of lit tea candles floating in a circular glass bowl filled with water and a small arrangement of carnations in the middle. Soft Sicilian music plays in the background and murals of Italy can be seen through out. For a minute or so I get caught up in the atmosphere and it brings a soft smile to my lips, I catch David looking at me and realize he'd probably been talking to me and I just zoned out into my own little world. "I'm sorry that was so rude I was just admiring the place" he laughs quietly and waves his hand seemingly not bothered by my absent mindedness.

"its alright, so does that mean you like it?" I take another look around the enchanting little place "I still haven't had the food so I'll hold off any opinions on that but the restaurant is pretty enchanting. Kind of feels like we're in a completely different place". He nods and starts to say something but the waiter arrives taking our drink order and handing us the dinner menu. "what were you saying before that?" David looks up from the menu and pauses almost as if he's trying to remember "Oh I was just gonna say I'm really glad you liked it. I took time to really think about the best place, I found this restaurant almost by mistake. A couple years ago my family was getting together and my older brother chose where we'd eat. Turns out he sent me the wrong address, I called him and he gave me the right one but it looked so inviting that I made a mental note to come back. I try to come every couple of weeks, I may be mildly addicted to their arancini"

"I'm not even gonna pretend I know what those are". His smile is endearing and I'm surprised that everything is flowing so well. "It's kind of like a deep fried rice ball filled with ragu. Trust me, one bite and you'll be hooked too". "Any other recommendations Mr. Hale?" He rubs his chin dramatically making me giggle despite myself "Honestly everything is really good so you won't go wrong no matter what you pick". I nod my head and examine the menu once again, ultimately I decide on the caponata and true to his word it was amazing. The sound that I made after the first bite was nothing short of a moan, that's how good it was. The proceeding heated look David gave me made me turn six shades of red. The chuckle after didn't help either.

The meal was nice there were no awkward pauses, conversation seemed to come easily and made the time pass by quicker than I'd realized. it was around 10 pm when we left, food long gone we had stayed to talk for a bit longer but seeing how busy the place was even at that hour we thought holding up the table any longer would be rude. We were silent as David walked me to my car, I grabbed my keys and stood there not knowing what the appropriate way to say goodbye was. Do I just give him a friendly wave? A hug? A kiss was not on the table but apparently I was the only one who thought so. I see the signs clear as day, the slowly getting closer, the deep look into the eyes, the slight lean forward. The next step is the tucking the hair behind the ears, right on schedule he reaches forward and gently tucks my loose hair behind my ear. Just then I get a fleeting image of Jax doing just that, it went through my mind so fast that I barely caught it but now its there. I close my eyes and take a breath, leaning forward I need to get on my tip toes a bit.

Just barely missing the kiss he was expecting I instead hug him. I don't need to see his face to feel the disappointment in his body, the way his shoulders fell and the hesitation before hugging back says it all. Thankfully when we pull away he offers a smile and nod which I return and we say our final goodbyes with promises to talk again. I could not be happier to get in my car, the night was so good but there was no way I was going to kiss him. Apart from barely having met him, how could I kiss Hale with the image of Jax there when I closed my eyes. David is sweet, responsible and the embodiment of all the good things a mother would want for her daughter. I'm still going to give him a chance, life is funny and you never know what can happen. If only it were so easy, if only I wasn't tempted to go to the bakery on the off chance a wandering Jax Teller will walk in like he usually does, shaking up my day and irritating me to no end.

The whole way home I let myself get lost in thought, the truth is I don't know much about Jax either but I can see a complicated person when I see one. That's not necessarily bad it just means they're harder to figure out. By the time I'm home and changed I still haven't made sense of my own thoughts so I did the one thing that has always calmed my mind. I searched for the box with my art supplies and just began painting. No concrete idea or plan I simply painted, pouring my emotions onto canvas letting out everything I've felt since that fateful call that changed my world.

When I'm done it's as if I've woken up from a trance, the painting before me is beautiful in a complex and almost painful way with glimmers of hope and happiness. It's everything I can't put into words and shows me things I wasn't even aware of. I go to sleep at peace no longer feeling at war with myself, painting did for me what it always has. Gave me an outlet to vent and in a strange way gave me answers putting my mind at ease. Some things seem clearer than they did before, it doesn't mean that I've stopped being conflicted, I was just able to reflect and realize that I've never been one to choose a road just because it's easier or safer.

Jax and David are two polar opposites but they both deserve an equal chance, I need to be open to knowing both if I'm ever going to decide which I want in my life more. Above all that though it made me see that my life shouldn't boil down to these two men, I have so much more going on and so much to accomplish. There's a town full of people to get to know and a family legacy to continue so I can't just let myself get lost, as easy as it would be, but I can't let myself get so wrapped up in a person that I forget myself and my life outside of them. With my mind and body losing the battle to exhaustion I surrender to sleep feeling lighter than I have in a while.


	14. Unwanted Encounters

**_22cjwolf22- thank you! I'm trying to make her as realistic as I can, her art is important to her so it will come back from time to time and we might see her struggle between the art she loved that was a part of her old life and the new life that comes with the weight of a family legacy._**

 ** _Riddicks-gurl1988- I'm sorry if she came off judgey but I felt like I wanted to give her a genuine reaction. She was already struggling with her feelings and whether or not Jax was worth the risk. Seeing what she did I think feeling hurt and letting that get to her and how she was thinking was the most realistic response._**

 ** _Foreverkee- I'll try to keep them coming at a more steady pace haha I'm definitely looking forward to writing Jax reaction to finding out about the date._**

 ** _Khyharah- he'll find out soon enough lol_**

 ** _SweetBlackAngel16- I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! Honestly I'm disappointed at how short they've been too, I'm trying but sometimes I'd rather get something out to you guys even though it's shorter instead of nothing at all. I really hope you keep reading though :)_**

 **Chapter 13: Unwanted Encounters** ****

I've spent the entire morning ordering all the stock I'll need to start the bakery back up once again. I'm so grateful to have had a grandfather that kept his business in order so making sense of it wasn't difficult. I know almost every detail except for a recurring monthly payment of a little over $5,000. It's something I definitely need to look into but I had to choose to put it off for now until I have the time to get to the bottom of it, I can't allow that much money to keep going to something or someone that I'm not aware of.

With business out of the way I start on a dessert not knowing what I should make for dinner at Gemma's. Ultimately after flipping through my grandfather's recipes I go for a sure pleaser, Apple pie turnovers. These I could make with my eyes closed, I used to make them every thanksgiving with my mom and I've yet to meet someone that doesn't like them. I line up all the ingredients but a knock at the front stops me, I could ignore it but being rude isn't a good way to impress the locals. I almost change my mind and turn back when I spot Ethan Zobelle standing outside the door but this time there's another man with him.

Jax warning rings in my head but I do my best to appear calm and normal after all of he really is dangerous then I don't need him thinking I know anything.

I open up with a smile and let them enter, making sure it clicks to stay open I offer them a drink that they politely declined. "Well to what do I owe this surprise visit?". I keep my voice even and friendly "Just wanted to come by, make sure we're still on for the charity plans. Actually I'd like to introduce you to my friend and business partner Aj Weston". I extend my hand and he shakes it, the smile he gives seems practiced in some way it just doesn't reach his eyes. They seem cold and calculating with a thin veil of politeness to cover up whatever is really there underneath.

"It's nice to meet you Mr Weston" it's really not but it's not like I'm going to admit it. "Aj is working closely with me on the event so I wanted you two to meet in case anything happens and I'm not around, Aj is your man". I nod in understanding just trying to get this conversation over as quickly as possible. "Truthfully I also had an alternate reason for coming by" I lift an eyebrow silently asking what else he could want. "I know this isn't exactly my business but I have a daughter Clos to your age and you seem like a sweet girl, I couldn't help but notice though that you're acquainted with the sons of Anarchy motorcycle club. Jax Teller in particular, are you particularly close to them?".

I feel my eyebrows furrow, I don't see how that's his business at all. Normally I'd be touched by the concern but this isn't an innocent inquiry, there's more to it I just don't know how that could matter in any way. "My grandfather was close to them and they've been nice enough to help me get settled in and acquainted with the town. I appreciate the concern but I think I'm alright". He tilts his head and shrugs his shoulder making it obvious that he doesn't agree with my opinion "I can't tell you what to do, I'd just hate to see you get hurt because of your association with them" A chill runs down my spine, I may not know much but I can tell somethings not right here.

"They don't uphold the right kind of morals or beliefs. Good girl like you shouldn't let herself be brought down by the likes of them" for the first time Aj jumps into the conversation but I wish he hadn't "Don't mind Aj, tact isn't his strongest quality. Like I said we're simply concerned. Just think about what I said it's for your well being". Not noting what to say I distractedly nod and with a squeeze of my shoulder they leave.

The uneasy feeling doesn't leave with them though, my automatic instinct is to call Jax but they didn't specifically say anything so what would I really tell him? That I had a feeling? I'll be getting him all riled up for nothing. Trying to rid myself of the anxiety the short conversation caused I focus on finishing up the apple pie turnovers in time to get home and get myself ready for dinner.


	15. Chapter 14

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thanks again for the reviews and all the support please keep it coming! I hope you enjoy this chapter, I definitely look forward to your feedback :D**_

 **Chapter: 14 Revelations**

Here I stand on Gemma's porch trying to ease my nerves, despite knowing most of the people that will most likely be here I cant help but feel nervous. I wipe my sweaty hand on my light wash denim jeans and adjust my red and blue flannel top, looking down at my old flat lace up brown leather boots I build up my confidence and ring the door bell with the turnovers in a covered dish. The door swings open and Gemma herself is there greeting me, she pulls me into a hug and whispers in my ear "took you long enough to finally ring that bell".

She pulls away with a knowing smirk and I try to hide my embarrassment "Come on in I'll show you where to put that" I follow Gemma while discreetly looking around, I've got to say they have a really nice home. It's inviting and warm which is a surprise given how tough clay and Gemma are. Then again Gemma is very much a mother hen so it should've been expected, family is obviously extremely important to her and that means having a home anyone would wanna come to. I set the dish down and go say hi to everyone, most of the guys from the club are there, so are Opie's kids Ellie and Kenny and his wife Donna.

I end up sitting next to Donna and striking up a conversation. "Did you know that your grandfather actually made all of Ellie and Kenny's birthday cakes?". "No I had no idea, you'll have to tell me when they are. I'd love to continue doing it". Donna kinda waved her hand and looked a bit apologetic "Oh no I didn't mean it like that its just a nice tradition we had I thought you'd like hearing it". I pat her hand and offer a sincere smile "No worries I know it wasn't but I think its sweet and if you guys don't mind id like to be a part of it". The look on her face changed to a happy one "We'd really like that". We shared a quick side hug Donna really does seem sweet and down to earth. Talking to her helped put me more at ease, somehow I get dragged into a conversation between Chibs, Bobby and Tig about alcohol preferences, I decided to keep quiet about my strong dislike of liquor.

There's no big reason I just can't take the bitter taste of alcohol. Instead I just switch between views backing one of them just to annoy the others. In the back of my mind I notice Jax's absence, its his family dinner so I figured he'd have to be here. Slight worry seeps in when Gemma calls us all to the table, she directs me to where she wants me to sit. Once we're all gathered I see the seat next to me on my left is empty, when I look up my eyes meet Gemma's "It's Jax seat he's just running late". I just nod trying to look cool, it becomes significantly harder when Tig chimes in "He's probably checking in on the druggie". The confusion must have showed on my face cause Donna sitting on my right leans in "Wendy, Jax ex wife, that's who he's talking about. Don't worry they're over but she's pregnant with their baby so Jax occasionally checks up on her".

I just shrug as nonchalantly as possible "I have no reason to be bothered, I barely know him". By the look on her face I'm not sure Donna believed me but hell I don't believe me. I don't know how to feel about this new revelation, obviously we all had a past and from what Donna says it sounds like they've finalized their divorce but if they're having a child together that bonds them for life. She's carrying his son or daughter and that means even if they both truly move on and meet new people they'll still always have some form of relationship. What am I thinking? I'm getting way too ahead of myself.

The food is fantastic and it feels like a real family, everyone passes the dishes around and chat amongst themselves. Laughter fills the room and I observe Gemma just looking at everyone with a glint of contentment and pride seeing the family they've made, blood related or otherwise, gathered around the table sharing a meal. That's why she does it why she's so tough and works so hard because at the end of the week she wants her family safe and sitting around this table sharing another meal.

We're already eating dessert, which I got many compliments for and even a joke marriage proposal from Tig, when Jax finally shows up plopping down next to me. Leaning over to his left he gives his mom a kiss "Hey ma, sorry I got caught up" "mhmm bout time you showed up". Gemma shakes her head with a smile and brings Jax a plate of food. "Hey Phi how've you been?" I just stare for a second taken aback by the nickname and the soft way it rolls off his tongue. "You know just keeping busy" I shrug my shoulder all of a sudden feeling very much like a shy teenage girl. He starts to eat his food and we all finish off dessert when Bobby makes the entire night go to awkward hell.

"So Soph I heard something interesting from a friend" I look at Bobby wondering what I could have to do with it "Really? What was it?". I take a sip of my drink "Well he said he saw you out with Hale looking cozy" I nearly choke on my water making me cough and an amused smile enters bobbies eyes. Jax leans back and looks at me with an indiscernible expression "You're dating Hale?" I sigh not having expected for David to come up at all this evening "It was one date, I wouldn't qualify that as dating". "So you hales girl now or something?" its clay who asks and I start to wonder why it even matters "not that its everyone's business exactly but no, I'm not anyone's girl. He asked me out and I said yes". Tig laughs obviously enjoying my awkwardness "So what'd the guy have to do to get you to say yes, Pull you over?" My face gave me away and another round of laughter erupted "you've gotta be kidding me" Chibs says and I realize having a cop pull you over then ask you out may be a little outside of the usual. Finally Gemma steps in and settles things down but Jax is pretty quiet after that and I can't imagine why.

I help Gemma clean up and say my good byes to everyone before taking my leave. Gemma walks me out stopping just outside her front door "I'm not going to tell you that David Hale is a bad man cause he's not. I am gonna tell you to think long and hard about yourself and your life. Where do you want it to go, how do you want it to look cause trust me sweetheart the man you choose will make a difference. Next time you're with Hale, ask him about his relationship with your grandfather". She kisses my cheek and walks back into the house, damn that woman what could she mean? If there was bad blood between them I doubt he'd have wanted to go out with me.

Of course knowing myself I wont let it go until I get to talk to David and ask him about it. When I look up towards my car I see the stoic figure of Jax Teller, cigarette in hand, leaning against my driver side door. I go up to him expecting him to say something but all I get is silence, we both wait to see who will break it first. "Fucking Hale, really? Didn't peg you for the boy scout type" my first instinct is to get defensive but that's not gonna work with Jax it'll just turn into a huge blow up. "Look Jax I'm not exactly sure why you even care but I don't wanna argue with you". His jaw is tense although he appears calm that small thing gives away that he's more than a bit annoyed at the situation "Had to pull the cop routine to get you, did he screw you in his squad car too?".

I couldn't stop the anger that filled my body, I knew that most of it was compensating for how much that statement hurt, If I was angry it stopped the hurt from settling in "You're so lucky Jackson Teller that I don't slap the smug straight off of your face. How dare you! I'm not sure how many girls accept you talking to them like that but I sure as hell won't. Even if I had fucked him every which way it still wouldn't be your god damn problem but for the record no I didn't. Not that I owe you any explanations either way". I step around him trying to calm myself down, yanking my door open I try getting into my car but Jax wraps his arms around me from behind sandwiching me between his arms and chest keeping me from moving "I'm sorry Phi I shouldn't have said that, sometimes my mouth works faster than my brain. I just…I think about Hale of all people getting to have you and I can't stand it. I wanna punch his self righteous face in".

I turn around so I can face Jax, we're so close that I need to look up to see his face but he's looking away from me the porch light illuminating his face. Reaching up I turn it towards me "If you ever talk to me like that again, the only person getting punched will be you". The slight playfulness in my voice makes the corner of his mouth tilt up "understood doll". I back up feeling his hands fall away and see him shove them into his pocket. I'm in and about to close my door when Jax bends down "You gonna see him again?" I tap my finger on my steering wheel honestly thinking about it. "Maybe…unless you give me a reason not to. Night Jax". With that I leave him standing on the drive way with a dangerous looking smirk on his devilishly handsome face. Its that face they preoccupies my thoughts most of the way home which is why I fail to realize that I never told Jax about my encounter with Zobelle and make a mental note to bring it up soon.


	16. Chapter 15

A short one! Just wanted you guys to know… I'M BACK! I know its been so long and hope you guys can forgive me and continue to read and support this story. If I could only tell you all the shit I've been through these past few months. Anyways the point is I'm back and in a better place and I'm so excited to pick this back up. I hope this chapter is ok I'm trying to get back into my groove so ant feedback would be great. LOVE YOU GUYS…ENJOY :)

Lifes somewhat gone on like normal, I haven't seen Jax since Sunday night after our little fight. We left off on an interesting almost daring note which I was sure would start something. Instead I've seen him less than ever. Hale on the other hand hasn't stopped trying to see me and truthfully I've been doing my best to avoid him at all costs. I know its not right but I'm not sure what I'll do when I do see him. So I took the adult route of ignoring everything else in my life and just focusing on getting the orders done for Zobelle's event. I'm hoping after this he'll stay far away from me, everywhere I go I feel eyes on me and more than once I've looked around only to find Aj staring straight at me. Over the past week I also held interviews and hired two people, Ethan and Jane, to help me around the bakery and get things ready for the grand re-opening. We're all wearing t-shirts with the bakeries logo on it loading everything into our delivery van that they will drive while I follow behind in my car.

"Ethan can you go get the last rack so we can finish getting them sorted". I call out focused on getting everything arranged so nothing will fall or get damaged in transport. "Here you go sweetheart" I whip around so fast I'm surprised I didn't fall. Of course after a whole week of no contact the charming devil clad in leather would be standing there with his signature smirk looking as good as ever. Ethan and Jane are just kind of standing there watching us not having anything else to do. I silently take the tray from Jax and get things settled, when I go to jump out of the back of the van Jax lifts me out instead and I do my best to not blush. "You guys take the van, ill follow shortly. Make sure nothing gets ruined". With a nod from Ethan and a wink from Jane they jump in and take off slowly. So here I am alone with Jax, I guess this is what I had wanted all week wasn't it?

"Why are you here jax?" There's no ill intent in my voice just genuine curiosity. "Where else would I be? Admit it you're happy to see me. If anything you know it won't be a boring day". I shake my head but smile, he's something else. For a few seconds we stand there looking at each other getting closer slowly. When he reaches to tuck my hair behind my ear I see something in his eyes and know exactly why he's here. "You're worried aren't you? There's something between you and Zobelle". He sighs heavily and shoves his hands in his pockets "He's not what he seems phi, just trust me on that". His words bring me back to the little encounter I had with Zobelle and Aj last week. "He warned me about you, said hanging with the Sons would get me hurt". Jax eyes darken and there's suddenly tension in his body "when was this?"

I shrug sheepishly "I don't know…maybe a week or so". His hand rakes through his hair "Jesus Christ phi, didn't you think that was something you should've told one of us?" I slide my hands in my back pockets "Maybe, but at this point it doesn't matter. Nothing happened and I'm about to be late for the event". I walk around Jax but he just follows "I'm coming and you're not changing my mind". He swings his long muscular legs onto his bike and offers me a helmet. Looking down I see how late its getting and decide to just go with it. Secretly we both know as I wrap my arms around his waist that I'm not all that upset at this turn of events. Soon I relax against Jax and enjoy the feel of the wind as the intoxicating scent of Jax, a mix of leather whiskey and something woodsy, completely surround me and as we pull up I wish we could just ride forever.


	17. Unsteady

_**Another Chapter! Please review so I know I'm headed in the right direction with this. Enjoy!**_

When we arrived I hopped off and without even seeing if Jax was keeping up I jogged to where our set up was and helped get things in order and looking nice. The next couple of hours consisted of tons of talking, I got to meet a lot of the towns people. We also handed out business cards with the new re-opening date, it was great to see how many people were genuinely excited about it. The entire time Jax was never too far away sticking close to me while keeping a distance. I had seen Zobelle and Aj but merely waved hoping they wouldn't make their way over. It was fairly obvious that they took note of Jax presence and weren't very pleased, hopefully that means they'll continue to keep their distance. They may not have done anything explicitly wrong, that I've seen at least, but something just feels inherently wrong with them, its hard to describe and even harder to actually point out but some things you just know.

At some point Gemma showed up and started helping out which was a surprise but I know she involves herself in community things so I suppose its not that weird. Jax walks over and grabs a pastry and I slap his hand away a second too late "last I checked those aren't for you" he smirks shrugging his broad shoulders "they're for the needy, there's more than one way to be in need". He winks and finishes his pastry in a single bite while I just shake my head hiding a smile. I'm about to attempt a witty retort when I spot Hale power walking towards us and from his face this wasn't about to be a friendly encounter.

"Hey David, how have you been?" I try to set an easy conversational tone, Hale standing less than a foot in front of me with crossed arms and his signature stern look. "I'm not sure since you've been ignoring me, then the next time I see you, you seem awfully close to Teller". I see where this is going and I don't like it, this is gonna turn into a dick measuring contest real quick if I don't cut it off. "I'm sorry I've been busy, I certainly wasn't ignoring you and Jax came to help me out. How about we talk about this later, okay?" Just when his body language was changing and I thought the impending scene had been squashed Jax feels the need to chime in "It's not your job to nurse his ego Phi, you win some you lose some" the last part is directed at Hale and they step towards each other. Without a second thought I step in between them looking around to see we're beginning to draw a crowd "We're not doing this, not here. Jax give us a minute". I push against his chest lightly until he walks off but only just a bit.

"The last time I checked David, you should be the one keeping the peace". He places his hands down on his hips, his jaw clenching "I thought you knew better than to get yourself mixed up with Teller and his crew. I thought you'd be smarter than your grandpa, they do nothing but bring chaos to this town. Those are not the kind of people you should be associating with. They'll just bring you down to their level and ruin you". For a moment I don't respond almost not believing what he just said to me

"Hale, we went on one date and that somehow makes you feel like you know what's best for my life? Or better yet, that you can tell me how I should be living it? If my grandfather had a friendship with Jax and his family then that's enough for me to trust them despite how lowly you think of all of them. Did you think that insulting my grandpa was somehow gonna get you extra points? I'm glad to see your true colors come out so I don't keep wasting my time".

Hale looks stunned and regretful all at once "I thought you were something else, you seem to think so highly of yourself. We all have flaws and we all have skeletons, sometimes the ones that pretend they don't have the most". He shakes his hand almost as if he's trying to get his thoughts together but there's too many at once "That's not what I meant…at least I didn't mean for it to come out the way it did. I think so much of you". I put my hand up to stop him "You do? And yet you seem to hate everyone whos embraced me as family. I think you should go Hale. I can't do this right now I'm working". Just like that I turn and within seconds I feel him reluctantly walk away.

"You alright doll?" I look up into Jax's clear blue eyes and I come to terms with something I've known for a while "Yeah, I'm always alright". I softly reply and from then on the day continued normally until the event was over and it was time to pack up. Jax and Gemma helped Ethan, Jane and I load things in and I instructed Ethan and Jane to go put things away then lock up. Jax and I hadn't really talked about me riding back with him but I wanted to and wasn't going to stop myself from enjoying an evening motorcycle ride. I thought I caught a slight smile from Gemma but if I did it was instantly gone, her normal cool expression back in place. We're steps away from the bike when Jax cell rings and he steps away to answer leaving me standing there with Gemma.

"I saw that little…talk you had with Hale earlier" Gemma breaks the ice putting it out there then lighting up a cigarette "It got a little heated huh?" I sighed and just looked away not sure what her end game is "David Hale and I just seem to have some differences of opinion. He let me know his and I laid out mine quite clearly". This time the smirk was there as she blew out a puff of smoke "I'm proud of you sweetheart" color me shocked, that was not what I expected at all "Thanks?" she taps her cigarette off letting the ashes fall "You're more like me than you think. We feel deep but we're strong enough to keep things in control. You didn't let Hale walk over you and lord knows you haven't made it easy for Jax like every other girl. People will always push you just gotta stand your ground or you'll spend your whole life getting run over".

I look at Gemma and for the first time I feel like I truly understand her and I nod embracing the peaceful silence that ensues until Jax comes back over. "Sorry Phi we have an emergency and I have to go" before I can even respond Gemma is waving him off "Don't worry baby she can ride with me. Go take care of things". Quickly he gives Gemma a kiss and to my surprise he gives me one to and mounts his bike taking off like a bat out of hell. I avoid Gemma's gaze but hear her chuckle, ignoring it I jump into her shiny black Cadillac.

We spontaneously decide to go have dinner together out of the way. It's by far one of the best and most laid back meals I've had in a long time, I felt at home with Gemma and it took away some of that intimidating veil that surrounds Gemma Teller. She's sarcastic, funny, fierce and undeniably smart and I can understand why she so easily keeps everyone in check while having the men in her life still love and depend on her. I left feeling like I had gained a friend and confidant that I could count on. The ride back is silent but relaxingly so, I think about my life and realize I'm happy and at peace with where it is but more importantly where its heading.

I've spent so much time since moving back listening to the whispers and the judgements when all Gemma and the SONS have done is welcome me and treat me like family and I'm ready to embrace that. Some people are just scared of what they don't understand or can't control, the people that go against the grain and choose to live differently. No doubt opening myself up to them and their lives fully will bring consequences and hardships but, doesn't everything? My musings are cut short as we arrive at a stop sign on a back country road and suddenly there's a woman frantically knocking on the window screaming that her child is choking. Gemma and I rush out to help but lift to see nothing but a plastic baby doll. That's the last thing I register before a burning pain leads me to unconsciousness.


	18. Not The Same As I Was Before

**Authors Note: Before you guys read this chapter I want to say that there will be differences regarding how this scene and the aftermath goes down. I re-wrote this more times than you can imagine and I don't think everyone will be happy with it but if I keep reworking it I'm gonna go crazy. I hope you enjoy it but I'm sorry if part of it offends anyone.**

 **WARNING- This chapter will contain an abuse scene so if that may be a trigger for you please don't read it.**

In life, there are moments that seem so unreal that it's as if your mind slows down and you don't actually register what is happening. Most of the time when people experience those moments it's because they're surprised by something amazing and unbelievable. Perhaps you've been there on your wedding day, at the birth of a child, when meeting a childhood hero perhaps. There's the other side to it, the side where you refuse to believe that you've been caught up in something horrific, something out of a horror movie.

That's the side I'm on. My eyes are blurry and desperately trying to focus, my shoulders and arms ache as I hang by them from some sort of metal fencing, my feet unable to touch the ground. My breathing is harsh and quick while I will myself not to panic but my mind is having a hard time trying to work out what is happening. I hear groans and turn the best I can and realize Gemma is on the opposite side of the fence in the same position I am. That's when it comes back to me, the lady with the fake baby attacking us but that doesn't tell me who is behind it and what the hell they could want with us.

"Gemma?" I whisper softly and hear her move. "Shit" she sighs under her breath. All of a sudden the door opens "Don't worry sweetheart, whatever happens we'll be fine just stay strong" Gemma hurriedly whispers back but it doesn't seem reassuring. There was a quiver in her voice that I'd never imagine coming out of someone as tough and fearless as Gemma Teller. For some reason it's that which dissipates the fog over my mind putting me on full alert. Through the door come several men in white rubber masks, 2 come to my side but I know there's more from the sound of it. They stare silently, getting closer and closer without saying a word.

"What do you want?! You know who I am?! You know what I can do to you?! Take off the mask, you Goddamn piece of sh1t!" Gemma yells but still no response. Gemma kicks one of the men and he grunts, they start grabbing at her and I desperately struggle wanting to free myself "NO! Don't touch her!" The men on my side start grabbing at me too and I kick wildly yelling at them to get away from me. They rip at our clothes tearing them away, the more we struggle the worse the physical beating is, Gemma's screams mix with mine and yet through it all they don't speak a word. Somehow that's more terrifying.

I can feel the blood from somewhere on my face drip into my eye, my voice is nearly gone and the pain that radiates through my body is unbearable. They take turns, raping us and swapping out with the next when they're done. At some point my mind and body shut down, there's no tears and no screams left just a determination to survive this.

"I'm sorry, ma'am. We're almost done". I hear a man behind me say to Gemma "Plea... Please" I hear her beg and it hurts my soul. They've broken her spirit and mine feels much they same.

The last man finishes off and pulls out, patting me on the cheek which is already bruised and I turn my face away not wanting him or any of them to touch me in any way. "We need you to pass on a message to your old man. Tell him to stop selling guns to niggers and wetbacks or we find you and we do this again". The same man says and I close my eyes praying for Gemma and I to have the strength to get through this.

I'm distantly aware of the man who spoke exiting the room leaving two behind to take us down. I feel them uncuff Gemma First then one comes to do the same for me. My legs give out and I fall to the floor, my arms are weak and struggle to hold my weight up but I do it. The man squats down offering a hand to help me up. For some reason that makes my blood boil and an all consuming rage comes over me, how dare he think I'd want to touch his hand? How fuckin dare he try to help after what he's done to me? I look up at him and spot a knife peeking out from his boot and my body moves without my even thinking of what I'm doing.

I snatch the knife and catch him off his guard slicing up and through his neck. I'm panting hard and ready to pass out. I see the man hit the floor, blood pooling out. The other runs over and once again feel a blunt pain that knocks me unconscious. I wake up at the back of a police car and sit up, groaning in the process. "You doin alright sweetheart?"

I instantly recognize the voice of Sherriff Unser. "I'll be fine" I answer back and look towards Gemma, she doesn't really say anything but we share a knowing look and she reaches over squeezing the hand that I rested on the side of the passengers seat she's in. I shift my eyes towards Unser and she nods "Yeah he knows, I had to tell him".

"So what now?" I ask not really knowing what to do. "Well I've been trying to convince Gemma to let me take you to the hospital but she doesn't want anyone to know". I look at Gemma once again and she averts her eyes, I know her enough to understand what she's thinking. It's complicated but I can't quiet my mind enough to decide if what she's thinking is actually for the best. "I have a friend who works at St. Thomas, if you let me call her I know she can get us in unnoticed. We'll figure things out from there". At the moment that's the best course of action I can think of. "You sure she can be trusted?" Gemma asks staring straight at me and I nod. "Can I borrow your cell?" I ask Unser and he hands it over.

I call Kim, an old friend who I've lost touch with but we we're extremely close, I'd trust her with my life. We have Unser swing by so we can get clothes, by the time we get to the hospital Kim meets us and takes us in. Kim leads us to a room that has two beds with a separator between "Sophie, what's going on? What happened?" Kim questions me trying to be quiet, shooting glances at Gemma who's sitting there glaring at her and Unser awkwardly stands to the side. "Look Kim, I know this is a lot to ask. I can't…I can't really say but I really need your help. We just want to keep this private". She sighs heavily but agrees "I'll put it in as a car accident and take care of the rest. You may not be ready now but you can trust me when you are". Kim goes to hug me and I flinch from the pain in my shoulders then try to cover it with a smile but she gives me a worried look.

"I'll be right back" With that she leaves. Unser also excuses himself saying he's got an idea. Just like that Gemma and I are left in the room together. We don't speak though, both of us lost in our own inner turmoil. Gemma's voice brings me out of my trance "We have to be strong for us, for them, for the club. You understand why we need to keep it quiet, don't you?" I stare at my hands, bruised and cut up. I sigh heavily "I understand why you want to keep it from them". That's all I can bring myself to say.

There wasn't much talk after that, Kim came in and examined us both separately. My body was there but my mind was completely gone. Unser returned and told us Clay and all the guys were there, how he'd heard Kim and had the idea to set up the car crash scene before letting them know. Kim agreed to talk to them and tell them Gemma wasn't ready to see anyone.

I wanted to stay out of it so I hugged Gemma and snuck out with the prescription for Antibiotics that Kim gave me, having Unser give me a ride back home. I was able to avoid them all although I heard their voices, I'd be surprised if the whole hospital wasn't aware of their presence. Arriving home I quickly let myself in and locked the door behind me. I stood for a few seconds just looking around the living room, it looks normal just the same as it did yesterday. But I'm not the same as I was yesterday. The thought reverberated through my mind and I felt myself slowly crumble until I was on the floor sobbing where no one could see me, no one could judge me.


End file.
